>Parents Behaving Badly

>I’ve been writing in numerous places this week about the lack of discipline I’m seeing in today’s kids. My experience yesterday was another perfect example.

I took Punky to her zoo class yesterday- It’s a home school class, so younger siblings and parents are allowed to sit in. I had brought several Matchbox-sized cars to keep Bruiser occupied while his sister was learning, and the cars quickly caught the attention of two other toddler boys in the room.

Bruiser’s two favorite cars are from the movie, Cars– the blue racecar, which he calls, “Blue,” and the red car, Lightning McQueen, which he calls, “Queen.” He will readily share the blue car, and any other car for that matter, with friends and family members. But Queen is, for all intents and purposes, Bruiser’s lovey. You do not take Queen from Bruiser. Ever.

And so of course, both boys in the room yesterday wanted Queen. Bruiser would offer them every other car, but still, they’d grab for Queen. The first time one of the boys managed to get his hands on it, Bruiser behaved admirably. He marched over to the boy’s mother, pointed at his red car, and stuck his lower lip out in an exaggerated pantomime of disappointment. I was impressed by how quickly Bruiser had figured out the easiest way to get his car back, rather than resorting to hitting or shoving.

“Give the car back, Stewart,” the mother told her son. Reluctantly, the boy gave it back. Then, less than a minute later, Stewart took it again. Bruiser tried offering him other cars, but it was no use. The boy only wanted Queen. Bruiser looked again to Stewart’s mother for help.

“Stewart, give him his car back,” she said.

“No!” Stewart yelled. Bruiser stomped his foot and stuck his lower lip out further.

“Give him the car,” the mother said again.

“No!”

“Well, tell him you’re just going to look at it for a minute,” the mother said finally.

I was annoyed. This kind of thing is so typical. Even though my son was clearly upset that his own toy had been taken away, Stewart’s mother was only concerned with her own son’s happiness.

And yet I didn’t step in, because I wanted Bruiser to figure out how to get the toy back on his own (which he did, eventually). I did, however, direct a few very dark thoughts toward the mother.

Once Bruiser got his car back, he stayed the heck away from Stewart. That’s how he ended up playing with the other toddler boy in the room, who quickly took Bruiser’s Queen away. And his parents responded the exact same way.

“Carmichael, give that little boy his car back.”

“No!”

Silence.

What the hell, parents? Number one, you’re teaching your child not to obey you because there are no consequences. Number two, you’re teaching them to that it’s okay to take whatever they want, even if it’s not theirs.

If this had happened once in the classroom, I wouldn’t have thought much about it. But to happen twice, with the only two other boys in the room?

Parents, we’ve got a problem.

This post originally appeared on Parents.com.