> It’s time again for the Perfect Post Awards, a monthly honor given by bloggers to their favorite posts of the preceding month. This month, my Perfect Post Award goes out to the amazingly lovely and talented Grace Davis for her post, I Have Returned. She managed to uniquely and hilariously convey the abject horror […]
September 1, 2006
> Thanks to the miracle that is Google, I’ve been getting lots of strange e-mails lately from searchers who feel a burning need to bare their souls to a random, but seemingly nice enough suburban housewife. That’s why today, I’m happy to present to you… THE NEW AND IMPROVED SUBURBAN TURMOILADVICE COLUMN! Now with e-mails!!! […]
August 31, 2006
> I’m pretty sure that Kidz Bop is playing in a loop over Hell’s PA system. Because listening to a chorus of pre-pubescent crooners “sing” hits like Let’s Get It Started, Feel Good, Inc., and even Modest Mouse’s Float On is the cruelest form of aural torture I can imagine. I’ve thought long and hard […]
August 28, 2006
> Project Runway’s Laura Bennett is the woman I grew up wanting to be. She’s always perfectly put together, immaculately dressed and she’s got oodles of talent. She designs incredible outfits (with the exception of last week’s “cruise ship” disaster). She has a dry sense of humor and the voice and delivery of Lauren Bacall. […]
August 27, 2006
> Moms, do your toddlers have annoyingly wispy baby hair that won’t wrap around hot rollers or hold up under a bottle of White Rain hairspray? I’ve got just what you’re looking for! Yes! Wigs! They’re not just for prostitutes and bald men anymore! Your li’l doll can have a full head of Shirley Temple […]
August 25, 2006
>The other day, I mentioned the mysterious Soccer Mom Network, which is actually what I believe to be a transmitter in an undisclosed location that beams information into the brains of all the team moms. How else would I explain my innate knowledge of game times, e-mail addresses, and volunteer opportunities for my stepdaughter’s soccer […]
August 24, 2006
Surprise, surprise. I was a sorority girl. And although I gave it my best effort, somehow going to parties with names like Pimps and Prostitutes and fending off would-be rapists posing as frat boys just wasn’t the kick I thought it would be. At the time, my life in the sorority house was anything but […]
August 23, 2006
>Trying to sleep while pregnant is damned near impossible. According to the experts, we knocked up women shouldn’t sleep on our stomachs, for obvious reasons. Nor should we sleep on our backs or our right sides, because of some shit about cutting off blood flow to the baby. So my nights are spent hunched on […]
August 21, 2006
