>She Runs This

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Your Teenager: So like, I have a note from my Algebra teacher for you guys. It’s like, stapled, but I read it anyway.

What You Thought You’d Say: See here, young lady. When a note from the teacher is stapled and addressed to me, you are not to open it!

What You’re Thinking: Well, honestly, I would have opened that letter, too. But I would have carefully pried the staples out of the holes with my fingernails and then bent them back into place afterward. This girl is brazen!

What You Say: Yes? And what does it say?

Your Teenager: It’s this thing about how, like, I’ve been late to class a lot and he’s afraid my work is slipping! But whatever! I’m totally making a good grade in that class!

What You Thought You’d Say: Tardies are inexcusable! You are not to be late! And I want to see your Algebra folder! I’ll see for myself whether this work is slipping!

What You’re Thinking: Tardies? Work slipping? Is this really our little brainiac talking? What is happening?!

What You Say: Why were you late?

Your Teenager: Well, I was like, really tired and I fell asleep on the way to school. So I had to do like, my makeup in the car before I could go in. So I was, like, late.

What You Thought You’d Say: That’s it. Applying makeup is not a valid excuse for tardiness. You’re grounded.

What You’re Thinking: …..What?! Did I just hear that?

What You Say: Oh. My.

Your Teenager: Yeah, so, just thought I’d tell you about that.

What You Thought You’d Say: Go to your room. And don’t come out until you’ve written a two-page essay on the importance of being on time.

What You’re Thinking: Okay, I’m really not in the mood for the patented Teenage Stare of Death followed by a night of sulking, followed by being treated like I’m the antichrist for the next week. I just want to have a nice, quiet evening of family harmony. Is that so much to ask?

What you Say: Okay, well, thanks for telling us.

The Verdict: See title.

This post originally appeared on Parents.com.