>Embarrassing Parental Moment No. 8084
>Last night, we were taking my 16-year-old stepdaughter and her friend home from a school play when it happened.
“What do we have to eat at home?” she asked.
“How about I make you an omelet?” Hubs asked. “Since you’re trying to watch carbs.”
“That’s sounds good,” she said, “but I think I want something else to go with it.”
“Well, have you eaten all of those little weiners?” I said loudly, referring to some smoked mini-hotdogs she’d gotten at the grocery. Hubs gave me a look. Six months ago, there would have been screaming and laughter from the backseat. Now, there was only embarrassing silence. Maybe they hadn’t heard me.
“I think there are some little weiners left, if you haven’t already eaten them all!”
“Lindsay…” Hubs said gently.
“I wasn’t going to say anything,” 16 said primly from the backseat. “Little weiners?” She looked at her friend. “So immature!” They giggled disdainfully as I slunk down in my seat. I had committed a common but humiliating parental misstep, making a joke that was so six months ago.
I stayed silent until we passed the new Publix a few minutes from our home. “It’s opening in five days,” I said as we all stared at the massive new strip mall.
“Pubics,” I said.
Now that got a laugh.
>:) I apparently used the word “bitch” wrong when my 12yo sis brought me into her messenger conversation. The girl’s “name” was “[butrfly’s sister]’s bitch”. I said something like “Well, you are her bitch, right?” “AMY! OMG!!! What are you doing?? You’re being OLD!!”
>”Pubics” always got the laughs when I was in high school. I live on the west coast now and we don’t have any of those grocery stores. I miss the lime green.My niece wore a cute, brand new pair of pants one day and a month later was lamenting not having any cute clothes. I mentioned the pants and she huffed and said, “those are out of style now.” In a month. A month!
>The only thing better than Pubix is Harry Tweeter. (Harris Teeter for those not “in the know”.)
>… according to my son, I could suck the cool out of icecubes >o(I don’t even try now, I just work at embarrassing him whenever possible.(Hey, ya know somebody’s got to be responsible for warping the children in the family!!!)
>I agree with Pageant Mom- I want to know EXACTLY why my boys will be in therapy! B/c I put them there!
>I’ve never called it “Pubix” but I do call Magic Markets “Tragic Mark-up”.
>For shame! A six month old joke?What will you think of next?
>I thought only my family got a laugh out of calling Publix PUBICs…. oh that makes me feel so….well….not as lame as before.
>What’s NOT funny about ‘little weiners?’ How can that kind of funny AGE? Not possible, I’d say. (But then again, I’m unforgivably old.)
>LOL!!! Pubics!! We only have a Bloom – we call it boob…Pubics is funnier!xoLBC
>So jokes are time limited when they hit their teens..?loverly
>Well you got a good laugh out of me. LOL It must be the age. All parents are embarrassing. Well anyone that isnt 16 is embarrassing.LOL
>I’m with HBM. All potty/genital/gross-out humor never goes out of style. Although, I do remember being an adolescent and chatting with my boyfriend in our living room. My dad was in the kitchen, not knowing that we two were nearby. He let out a gigantic, enormous, incredibly large fart, and though normally I would have died laughing, I remember being a little more than mortified.
>My husband calls Harris Teeter, “Hairy Peter”. 🙂
>Wiener. Still giggling. And to think, I was thrilled last week when I managed to sneak it into two posts.Sigh. My age must be showing.I stopped trying to be cool a while ago. Now I aim for highly embarrassing. It’s much more memorable that way.
>Ewww. I couldn’t eat anything that came from a Pubix.
>You’re hysterical! I think I’ll hang out here awhile with you guys…